Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Randomize
