It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize