What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
