Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize