i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
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