So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Randomize