If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
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