Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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