Kareoke will never be a sober sport
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
They took my balls.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
