Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
Randomize
