just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
