You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize