how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
cat food counts as protein by the way
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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