I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
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