Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
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The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
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He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
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