Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
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