The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.