You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
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