Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Randomize
