the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
