Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Sorry about my life...
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
