it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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