I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found your dick twin last night
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
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