we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Randomize