WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Randomize