Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Randomize
