Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Randomize
