No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
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Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
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Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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