Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Randomize