hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
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