At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
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