I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Randomize