Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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