I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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