Texts From Last Night

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  (845): View more from New York

  don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter

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  (845): don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter http://tfl.nu/0xc6
  Replies (15) Good night (3569) Bad night (574)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.

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  (617): it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before. http://tfl.nu/1u0r
  Replies (20) Good night (575) Bad night (3708)
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  (540): View more from Virginia

  I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.

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  (540): I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal. http://tfl.nu/t01g
  Replies (22) Good night (1358) Bad night (3327)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds

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  (412): I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds http://tfl.nu/2vvx
  Replies (32) Good night (1566) Bad night (15460)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.

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  (614): woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever. http://tfl.nu/n8fb
  Replies (6) Good night (3124) Bad night (951)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice

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  (617): thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice http://tfl.nu/qv1j
  Replies (7) Good night (3191) Bad night (1044)
• Favorite

  (224): View more from Illinois

  dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks

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  (224): dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks http://tfl.nu/taq1
  Replies (6) Good night (663) Bad night (1866)
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  (864): View more from South Carolina

  We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.

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  (864): We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom. http://tfl.nu/8ad4
  Replies (1) Good night (641) Bad night (727)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"

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  (703): She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose" http://tfl.nu/hdxg
  Replies (3) Good night (916) Bad night (402)
• Favorite

  (209): View more from California

  Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.

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  (209): Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die. http://tfl.nu/72xy
  Replies (9) Good night (494) Bad night (1151)
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  (546): View more from

  As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.

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  (546): As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever. http://tfl.nu/al3c
  Replies (3) Good night (357) Bad night (623)
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  (718): View more from New York

  I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.

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  (718): I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best. http://tfl.nu/yss2
  Replies (5) Good night (934) Bad night (330)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.

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  (720): You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero. http://tfl.nu/rgb3
  Replies (2) Good night (810) Bad night (217)
• Favorite

  (602): View more from Arizona

  Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245

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  (602): Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245 http://tfl.nu/keca
  Replies (5) Good night (291) Bad night (221)
• Favorite

  (416): View more from Toronto

  He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.

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  (416): He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came. http://tfl.nu/cj68
  Replies (1) Good night (191) Bad night (443)

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