I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
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