These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
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His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
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like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
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