dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
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