so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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