On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Randomize