Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
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