i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
