i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
