i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
