so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
