Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
why do cheetos always look like penises
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Someone shattered a urinal.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Randomize
