Welp...herpes.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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