May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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