I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
Randomize