My friends, they love my intelligence
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Randomize
