I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
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