All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
we made out on top of his cat.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
